Friday, January 21, 2011

boundaries...

i wonder, oftentimes, if people really pay attention to what they're doing in public... now, i think the world has changed greatly since i was being reared by my parents... there is very little privacy now... we have social media sites that keep us all updated, to the second, on other people's lives... admittedly, i am one of those people who loves to see what's going on in my friends' lives on facebook...

but, seriously... and please understand that i'm not trying to point fingers or make fun of people...i'm not trying to judge people, either... i'm just wondering where the line stands with boundaries any more... maybe i'm the naive one? i don't know... but i guess i was raised to keep things that don't need to be publicized as private or among a small, intimate group of friends...or at least not posted on facebook, on a blog, or on TV...

here are some examples...

~twice, in the last few weeks, i've read on other people's blogs that they're bathing with their husbands... ok, now, i'm not a prude - and hooray for you for having some time with your spouse... but honestly, is that REALLY something that your readers need to read about on your blog (which happens to read by thousands of people)??? i really just clicked the link to your blog to see what awesome dessert you served today...or what awesome and creative craft you did with your kids...or what struggles you faced as a mom on that day. instead of talking about being in the bathtub with your man, can you say, "my husband and i were enjoying some well-deserved alone time??" instead, i leave your site with a picture of you and your spouse in the bath tub... ew...

~why do young girls take pictures of themselves in the bathroom and put the pictures up on facebook? they're NOT going to the bathroom, but it's obvious that they're in the bathroom... and the poses... seriously... why are we not teaching our daughters to have some pride and not to sexualize themselves by showing breasts, stomachs or underwear sticking out of their pants or spaghetti-strapped tank tops? we really need to mentor these young ladies...we need to teach these girls that they want to be the TOP apple on the tree...and make a future man reach and work hard for you because she is worth it... and maybe i feel this way because i taught some of these "babies," but no one wants to see you cheapen yourselves...

~for the most part, my only "adult" TV time is around 2 PM each week day... i can catch some non-cartoon-ish shows since the kids are napping... :) i usually watch some baby show...or some talk show... today, i have "Bringing Home Baby"on in the background... in case you don't watch, the show is about the first few days of a family with a brand new baby, and it captures their struggles and celebrations... today's show has a woman sitting on the couch nursing her newborn baby girl. a friend, who happens to be a male, arrives at their small apartment and comes in to meet the sweet baby. he walks in, as the mother is nursing (she is wearing a nursing tank top and is very well covered), and he gets close to the baby's face to see her. now, really...could he not wait until she was finished nursing?? he's right in the woman's breasts, for God's sake!!! (and, with this being said, i nursed my daughter for 14 months, exclusively... i never felt comfortable enough to nurse in a public situation - not even in front of my own mother. i am a very private person... but it would make me really uncomfortable if i was nursing my baby and a guy friend came in and got super close to my baby's face as she was attached to my breast.... wow....)

these are just a few examples of instances where i think the public struggles with boundaries... fortunately, while i'm a "just" a participant in these situations, i still feel slightly uncomfortable for the people in the situations. and, i would be lying if i felt the discomfort ended here... i think there are other times, too, where i feel boundaries are not respected on a more personal level - like when people come to your house and do things that you just can't believe... that's a whole 'nuther post, however... and i will save that for another time...

but, in the meantime, i'm going to shield my eyes as i look at things around me... i will still, without a doubt, be amazed at what people reveal, no matter how private or personal, but i can tell you one thing...don't count on me being the one to reveal things like this. and if i happen to "slip up," please consider yourself as one of my closest friends who i must feel so incredibly comfortable with that i could share such information... :)

3 comments:

Marc, Sarah, and Luke said...

All I have to say is -- I agree...Thanks for sharing your thoughts :)

Amy said...

Your first example made me laugh! I read this scenario on a blog (probably one of the same ones you read) and thought the exact same thing! I totally agree! :)

Amy said...

And thanks for your sweet comment on my blog! :)