values

i spent some time out in public this weekend... the mall, restaurants, the grocery store, a consignment shop... of course, when you spend time out, you are bound to come in contact with people...

now, i grew up, from the age of 8 on, in "the north," and it was a perfectly wonderful place to learn social graces and things of such... my mom was born and raised in the mid-west, so of course, i have a lot of her values and love in my socialization...
i remember that my mom was my best friend for a long, long time - especially when i was young (and still now, really)...i prefered to be with her over friends at times... perhaps it was because she is THE BEST... :) but, she was pretty much my one constant in life... she stayed home until i was in 3rd grade...and well, i was a military brat - so we moved A LOT... of course, that meant new houses, new schools, new friends, new neighborhoods...and well, my mom was always there... :)
since we were movers, i obviously developed a personality that would allow for me to be quite amicable...i made friends easily and learned that it was hard to say goodbye to old friends, but it was nice to say hello to new ones...

when ry and i moved to VA, the people were something i was struck by...they were SO friendly and kind...southern hospitality, i guess... it was refreshing... people would go out of their way to lend you a hand, they were quick to show you kindness, they'd call you "sweetie" or "honey" without a second thought...and they were patient and enjoyed every minute of the day... this is probably the greatest difference between "the north" and where i live now, in my opinion... in the north, everything is rushed, and there are few people who take the time to be nice...plain and simple... and when i came here...it was a wonderful change...

but this weekend... i felt like i was surrouneded by unkindness... people were too busy to stop...people were rude...and the looks that i got a few times... wow...

i drove home from the grocery store yesterday wanting to pray for the cashier at the grocery store i was at... i wasn't even in her lane, i was next to her...but as she was trying to step out from behind the cash register to take a bag to a waiting cart, my cart was in the way (which was put there by the bagger)... i was close enough to it to move it (i was in the middle of paying), so i did... i smiled and said, "excuse me...sorry about that..." what did i recieve? a glare... and when i was pushing my cart past her lane as i was leaving, she glared at me again...

when i was at the consignment shop, a brood of a family was walking around...2 children under the age of 2 1/2 and the mother was very pregnant with twins.... the grandmother was with them, too, probably to corral the 2 1/2 year old little boy who was off and exploring every few seconds (they had one of those sitting/standing strollers - he was standing while his little sister was sitting)... one of the volunteers who was working at the sale was being friendly to the family and was telling a story about her own grandchild who was as energetic and active as this 2 1/2 year old little boy... with a smile on her face, she was recalling when the nearby department store had to lock down its store b/c her grandson decided it was fun to play in the clothes racks and his mom couldn't find him... i heard her story and smiled at her as i felt a little panic as a mom myself just thinking of what i would do if i couldn't find K in a huge store...and yes, i was remembering the same game i'd play with my mom while shopping when i was a kid... meanwhile, the lady wasn't even talking to me, but i made sure to make eye contact with her and smile because the very pregnant mother and grandmother wouldn't even look at her or pay her any attention... courtesy...where was it?

i am thankful that i was raised with the values that i have... there's always time for a smile... i was taught to acknowledge people with eye contact if they were speaking... i was taught words like "excuse me" and "thank you" and "please" that would always be paired with a smile... i was taught that there are many minutes of the day...and yes, they are fleeting...but there's nothing more important than taking time out to be courteous and kind...

i will continue to pratice these habits...i have a little girl who needs to learn them now, and i hope and pray that my example will rub off on some of the people i meet who must have forgotten how to love one another...